From Mammy to Wifey
“Why I gotta fuck you up to make you fuck like that?”… she sings as she throws back her 23rd shot of good old Hennessy. Her body is loose, her actions vague but her eyes are telling. Telling of the last depressive two weeks she spent worrying about a Nigga who didn’t give a fuck. A fuck about her pain, the time she invested or the chance she took in loving him. In “Mammies, Matriarchs, And Other Controlling Images”, Patricia Collins analyses the multiple ways in which Black women are branded and rebranded to maintain United State’s social hierarchy. Through the use of Collins’ work, in comparing the historical Mammy figure and today’s Black Wifey, I argue that there has been a transferal of or a synonymous burden taking place in the home. This transferal today can be seen and heard throughout popular media like Issa Rae’s Insecure.
Although the Mammy character is a popular caricature of the Black woman, Black women are referred to by many names. In Collins’ work, she emphasises the numerous names given to Black women such as “Welfare Queen”, “Jezebel” and “Black lady”. Each of these names has its own specific definition that encompasses a woman’s body, socioeconomic status and relationship status. Collins argues that “culture is defined as the opposite of objectified nature” and as a result gives white men and women the right to “[define] people of colour as less than human or more natural”. In pushing the notion that Black women are in the same class as animals, Whites cover their mistreatment and exploitation of Black women under the guise of living off of the land, God’s gifts to man. Despite the awful use of religion in justifying their actions, the main goal in acclimating Black women to animals is in taking away their “subjectivity [to] support the political economy of domination” that Whites have built in the United States. This ‘political economy of domination’ coincides with Ida B. Wells’ speech on lynch laws. Like lynch laws, the multiplicity given to the Black body acts to create an unequal power dynamic where the actual naming is a form of fear inflicting power on the subject. Lynch laws were used to prevent Black people from voting while the multiple names given to Black women, act to reinforce social stereotypes to impact the psyche of the self.
Despite the numerous names given to Black women, the Mammy appears in the form of the Black Wifey today. The Black Wifey is described as a woman undertaking the emotional, financial and physical burdens in a romantic relationship. Whereas, Collins describes the Mammy as “the public face that whites expect Black women to assume”. In this role, the Mammy is poorly paid, sexually assaulted, overworked and emotionally available for the white family. Like the Wifey, the Mammy is forced to externalise herself for the benefit of those around her. The only difference is that the Wifey deals with the depth of externalisation from their partner. Unlike the Mammy, the Wifey’s relation to their partner is primarily for the partner’s benefit. As a result, in a world that already has numerous obstacles to stop and discourage Black women from progressing, her relationship becomes one of the major contributing factors to her demise. The Wifey’s inability to redirect her focus and abstaining from generational practices of hiding one’s emotions or completely ignoring them at the benefit of the emotional vampires that leash off of them. Although I argue that the Wifey and Mammy share similar emotional struggles what sets them apart and the other names Collins discusses, is that the Wifey is in a sense a sexualized Mammy and of the figures, she is expected to be all of these women, all for the benefit of her partner.
Although the Wifey highlights Black woman’s role in relation to her chosen partner, its sparks questions around the issue of Black women dating outside of their race. A 2017 Pew Research shows that Black men are more likely to date outside of their race. Although the data is dated, it shows that a far larger percent of Black women are less likely to marry or partake in interracial relationships. In relation, although Black women may not be interested in White other non-Black men, White men tend to be interested in Black women The interest of White men in Black women spark a controversial conversation around where their infatuation stems from. Is it lust or love, the idea to be with a Black woman to prove a point. The point being showing racial tolerance or another sick means to assume control over The Wifey. In a video, a ticktocker Jake, shares his views on why he is more interested and tend to date Black women over White women. Jake explains that his views are deeply rooted in sociology, a topic that does not predominantly affect White communities. Additionally, he talks about the caring nature of Black women in comparison to White women. This very point emphasises the burden that men on a whole expect Black women to accept. Jake shows appreciation but in accordance with his needs, a form of exploitation. As a result of this issue of exploitation, Bell Hooks in Eating the Other: Desire and Resistance, talks about the commodification of race, sex and ethnicity which leads to the “domina[tion] … in intimate relations” by the commanding group. A situation that is synonymous with Jake’s position as a White man preferring Black women.
To conclude, The Wifey image created in this article is a sexualized Mammy, a cuffed Jezebel and the economically insecure Black lady. She is all of these women with her burdens primarily coming from her partner. This very depiction can be seen in Issa Rae’s Insecure where Issa cheats on Lawrence because of being too emotionally burdened by him. Do women need to choose?
